Dating a Polyamorous Man For The First Time

Dating a polyamorous man is new for me but I’ve decided to give him a chance because I’m insanely attracted to him. He’s a working-class, blue-collar guy, who likes weed and has many tattoos. I met him a while ago on OKcupid. We chatted for a week then met in person about a week after matching with each other. I’m giving him a chance because he ticks most of the boxes.

Shane is a handsome redhead that’s tall, young, well endowed and fun to be around. He does have a couple of negative habits that I find extremely annoying but I”m choosing to enjoy the ride for now. For more on the fun times that Shane and I have together, check out “Typical Night With Shane“.  For the negatives, please read below.

What Annoys Me About Shane?

A negative and It’s a big one is that he already has a long-term partner who he obviously loves. Let me be clear, I’m not bothered that he has a primary partner. I understand this is par for the course when dating a polyamorous man.  I just have a problem with him oversharing with his primary partner. The details that he shares with her about our dates and phone messages just doesn’t sit well with me.  I don’t mind talking about our kids or our significant others ever so often.  What I dislike is the constant presence of the third person.  Our time should be exactly that, ” Our time”, an escape from the everyday stresses.

He’s a Chatty Boundary Pusher

Shane also constantly drops hints of wanting a threesome with me and his girlfriend, knowing that I’m not attracted to women.  I’ve made it clear in my dating profile on OkCupid   and also to him that I’m straight.  I’ve even told him on several occasions that the only threesome that would interest me are mfm, yet he keeps rambling on and on about her hoping that I’ll eventually relent and say; ” Great, I think she is wonderful too, lets all play together”.  He also mentioned that when he is with her, he constantly talks about me; surely she finds that annoying?

Shane told me that wifey gets off on sharing him and also enjoys hearing about his encounters ( although I’m not so sure that I believe him).  In my mind, Shane and wifey already have their dynamic and want a second woman who will join them as a couple when they are bored just fucking each other.  I find nothing wrong with that, but that is not the situation  I’m looking for.

Finding what I want is challenging so  I’ll likely keep seeing him until something (someone) more suitable comes along.

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